Stop wearing busy as a badge of honor.
I was that guy.
The “I’m too busy” guy. The “phone always in my hand and don’t wait to start dinner” guy. The “I don’t have time to take a vacation, but when I do go to Disneyland with my family, I’m still working” guy.
It was crazy, and not the fun kind.
Years ago, I believed busy and success went hand in hand. My mission was to be successful in business and I’d be damned if I failed a mission. Being in constant motion made me feel like I was moving towards the success I declared for myself. Yet I felt that I was failing in other parts of my life – namely spending enough time with my family.
And this is exactly the problem with being “busy.”
Writer and philosopher, Charles Eisenstein, powerfully articulates this paradox in his recent essay, “The Paradox of Busy.”
He says that our vanity, or ego, around the word “busy” happens because we associate it with importance. Busy people are needed, wanted, loved. On the other hand, we feel annoyed because we know deep down that as busypeople, we are not masters of our time, but subject to the whims of our calendars.
“I can’t go on vacation, I’m too busy.” We often use this excuse because it tells the people around us that we are so important and our work is thriving.
It validates our success and self-image.
In reality, we’re usually just insecure that things aren’t going well and feel taking time off will set us back. Tunnel vision prevents us from properly assessing our progress. So we keep chopping wood with a dull ax.
My challenge to you is to start uplifting yourself for the right things. Celebrate taking two weeks off to recharge – and never once answering a work email. Give yourself a pat on the back for going on a family vacation to Paris. Be the mom or dad that gets home by 5:30, plays on the floor with your kids, joins the family at the dinner table, and - most importantly - maintains presence.
I spoke about the revolutionaries in my Independence Day email a few weeks ago. Let’s represent what freedom and success is to badass 0.01%-ers, not the world’s unrealistic and damaging ideas about it, i.e. chasing the glory of the constant hustle and grind. Or what Mike Steadman and I called out on Dog Whistle Branding’s podcast as “hustle porn.”
I’d love to see some of these gurus who talk about not sleeping but constantly “work, work, work” 30 years from now. How many will be spewing the same philosophy? How many will be buried in the ground from exhaustion?
Will their children think about them fondly? Of course, we all know no childhood is perfect, but will there be consistent memories of happiness and joy? Or will there be memories of empty seats at the dinner table, missed baseball games, and distant relationships.
Which type of parent do you want to be?
I believe that by focusing on the 0.01% journey—which is enhancing your business, life, and self—all at the same time, we’re building better families. This leads to a stronger society, making a positive impact on the world. And that’s what our Cohort is about, challenging pre-dated mindsets and exploring the possibility that you can have it all—business, life and self—working successfully at the same time.
Get out your ax. I have the sharpener.
Onward,
BILL